I have been in a relationship for 7 years with a woman who has been barely caring, loving, intimate, sensual and sexual despite me being so with her. I have found this lack of connection and affection hard to cope with, causing much sadness. Although I have broken away many times to leave, I have stayed in the r'ship to this point and remained loyal. Is the problem with me or her and what should I do?

Hi Ben, simply it sounds like she doesn't value a caring and loving person like yourself. Ask yourself why then do you need this person when you would be well suited to may other women who would be more compatible to who you are and what you value. The truth Ben is the problem is always with ourselves, not saying we are bad people, it's just we need to work out ourselves first, and then it should become clear what we want and what we are not prepared to put up with. If a person isn't supporting you but draining your self esteem, the simple answer is leave for good.