Separation can be a good thing (Download)

By Michael Knight

Wednesday 27 October 2010

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It may not seem so at the time but Separating can be a good thing, and be very necessary with some people, benefiting the whole family. Whilst not advocating a breakup, there can be personality, maturity and behaviour changes in parents that make living together, let's say impossible. Hence, to avoid having a household filled with negativity that is unbearable, a Separation can be like opening up a window allowing a fresh Spring breeze to come flowing through restoring the much needed harmony and balance people need.

It doesn't mean that you're bad people or parents, it simply means things aren't working between Mum and Dad for some reason.

There are simply 3 decisions if this the case - One, try and work through the issues beginning with what both parents honestly value highly — hopefully keeping the family intact (preferable).

Two, Separate very slowly taking tiny steps to ensure everyone is understanding and coping with the changes (the next best thing).

Or three, stay all together in the family unhappy, causing conflict and unrest affecting the health, well-being and growth of all family members, especially the children (most undesirable).

Before making the ultimate decision to split which in turn affects the whole family, it's no doubt wise to hash out the reasons for wanting to Separate in the first place, assessing and revaluing what's really important to you all as a family, as opposed to putting the needs and desires of one person first, which is so often the case.

A Separation is simply a change of circumstances.

If done respectfully and carefully, minimising any nastiness and blame, it can make for some very satisfying results. Embracing change positively can actually keep a family together, maybe not under the same roof, but close by, seeing each other, communicating and allowing all family members to live a more fulfilling life, with the added bonus of experiencing change positively — a very important life lesson.

Who knows, with some time and space apart, you just may realise you really did love each other deeply and want to live back together, but as more mature and better people.

Life's a funny thing sometimes with it's twists and turns and we can never really foresee the future, especially when the days look dark and dim. However, being thoughtful, caring and generous to others, especially those you love — passing the test if you like �— may just see you reap the rewards you were always after.

Perception is what it's all about. Be true to yourself and kind to others and things will work out just fine.

With love, kindness and peace
Michael